Divorce Mediation Your Alternative to Court

As a professional who practices divorce mediation in NJ, I am constantly seeking continuing education opportunities to stay abreast of changes in the law and to learn advanced mediation techniques that can help the clients of Equitable Mediation Services achieve the best possible results in their particular case.  Having an office in East Brunswick, last evening I attended a workshop offered by the Middlesex County court system on divorce procedures to put myself in the shoes of an individual who was either contemplating bringing their divorce to court or going to file “pro se” and attempt to manage their own divorce without assistance.

Words cannot describe what transpired over the next two hours.

As an Accredited Professional Divorce Mediator in New Jersey I am required to posses an advanced understanding of the law and even with my extensive training and knowledge base, found myself at times lost amidst all the jargon, forms, procedures, rules of court and general mayhem that our legal system has become.  By the end of two hours, many of the attendees had glazed over and spent more time shifting uncomfortably in their seats than listening to the 8 presenters that put on the workshop.  And while I certainly appreciated the presenters volunteering to do this free of charge, it became very apparent to me that they were mired in the language of their world and spoke to the crowd as if they understood what a CIS, Notice of Proposed Final Judgment or Early Settlement Panel actually meant unlike for couples using divorce mediation in NJ where your divorce mediator actually takes the time to explain what the terms mean and only offers you information that is pertinent to your particular case.  It’s like your English teacher used to tell you how you can’t use a word to define itself?  Same thing here: no one actually told us what these terms meant before using them in a sentence.  Add to that the helpful packet of information they gave each attendee at the start of the presentation was so large, it did not fit into my binder.  I tried to use an elastic band to keep it all together since the binder clip they gave me couldn’t contain it all but it was no use.  The elastic snapped under the stress of being stretched too thin, trying to get around a stack of documents 3 inches high.

So what did I learn after going through this? Avoid going to court at all costs and use divorce mediation to settle your divorce.

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If you have any questions about divorce mediation or how mediation can benefit you, please feel free to contact us to schedule a free, no-obligation consultation in one of our nine North or Central New Jersey office locations where we will take some time to get to know more about you and your situation and see if mediation is right for you.  Of if you’re simply not ready yet, feel free to visit the Equitable Mediation Services website where you’ll find lots of great information about parenting plans, equitable distribution, NJ child support and spousal support / alimony and contact us when you’re ready.  We look forward to helping you get through your divorce peacefully, efficiently and with as little stress on you and your family as possible.